Let me tell you about a story of a maid of mine who worked for us for almost a year.
When we booted out a former househelp, we needed to get a new one right away just to keep watch over my son. With the kindness of a neighbor, we met Geleen (not her real name) who was a niece of that neighbor.
Now, we knew even before taking her that she needed special handling, not because she wasn't capable of looking after my boy but because she had a wild streak. But as her aunt told us, she was young, naive and without proper guidance. Geleen had to quit school after she got involved in a fraternity and her grades slipped. Honestly, she didn't look too keen on studying anyway, possibly because of the gang she was involved in. She was a troubled soul who sorely needed her mother, who left her with an aunt to live with a new man in her life. Regardless of all these, we took her in, knowing she had warts and all. I, as homemaker, constantly talked to her. I shared to her things about myself, hoping that she would share hers.
She had none of that, and we accepted that fact after months of trying. But we did our best to make her at home with the family, include her in family gatherings, trips. My son seemed to be ok with her, and that was all that mattered. She was a kid herself. She was always silent, no reaction or emotion at all.
There were good times and bad times. What I did not like about this girl was that she would go out of the house at night after we arrived home from the office to meet her gang. I would end up looking for her at the village streets, drinking and talking with friends. She was a minor and my employee, so I am naturally responsible for her. It was frustrating, and I tried to explain to her why she had to cut down her meeting with friends. In the end, I felt like she never heard anything I said at all. And she never talked about what her problems were, why she was like that.
In the end, we let her go after learning from my son's school that they saw my son being left to the company of two guys whom we did not know or were not familiar with. In my panic, I immediately called Geleen, who was not answering her mobile or the telephone. I later learned that Geleen went out of the house and left my kid to the company of strangers. Thank God, they were kind enough to my son. Nevermind the house, just my son.... Although they seem to be innocent, still the house policy of not letting in any strangers was violated. My anger and disgust finally got the better of me, and I asked her to leave that very instant I arrived home.
Was I guilty that I was booting out a young girl from my house at night? Not really, her aunt (which had long since transferred to another area) had plenty of friends in the village that she could stay with momentarily. We learned a few days later that she slept at a friend's house rather than staying with her aunt's friend.
Just recently, we learned that Geleen worked in night club and met an older guy who made sense out of her. We're quite happy that she's finally settled, because if she doesn't now, she'll end up just like her mother. We hope the guy she's living with will be a patient man that will reach through her, something we were hoping to do.
Do we still do this to our house helpers? Of course we do. Just because Geleen required special handling doesn't mean that the others won't. It's been always like this in the household. Our maids are very open and comfortable with us without going overboard. And I hope it stays that way.
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